


not untrue

by marginaliana



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: Campaign 2 episode 110, Gen, M/M, it's love that makes people, pain just sometimes makes you kind of an asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:15:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26564983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marginaliana/pseuds/marginaliana
Summary: Caduceus asks questions; Caleb has some of his own; neither of them like the answers.
Relationships: Caduceus Clay & Caleb Widogast, Caduceus Clay/Eodwulf (potential), Caduceus Clay/Fjord (referenced)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 108





	not untrue

"When you're ready," Caduceus says. "Will you tell us about them? Your friends, I mean."

In the new magical library room it's quiet, an offer more than a question. Caleb does not know how to feel about the fact that Caduceus has named Astrid and Eodwulf his friends. Not former friends. Just friends.

He hopes that they are – he cannot deny that.

"What do you wish to know?" he asks, taking his hand off the spine of the book he'd been reaching for. "And why?"

"Anything you want to tell us, really," says Caduceus. "As to why… well. You believe they can be redeemed. The more we know, the better we can help you with that." He pauses, but Caleb knows this sort of silence. He waits. Eventually Caduceus speaks again. "And the gentleman. Eodwulf. I liked him. He has a sense of humor."

Something dark flares in the pit of Caleb's stomach. "Just because Fjord does not need you anymore," he snaps out, "does not mean you must find another beautiful man to save."

Caduceus freezes, then swallows hard. Caleb has hit on something with this, he realizes, though he had only half-known it was there to hit.

Regret comes swiftly, as it always does now. He knows that he has been waiting for this, this opportunity to lash out. He was not stupid enough to let that impulse free with Trent, but some part of him must have thought Caduceus safe. Someone who could receive Caleb's anger and simply swallow it, let it pass through without leaving a mark.

He so often forgets that Caduceus can be hurt. They all do. 

"I am sorry," Caleb says. "That was cruel, and you did not deserve it."

Caduceus bows his head; his hair falls in front of his face, hiding his expression. Much like Astrid's had done, hiding her scars. "But not untrue," he says.

Caleb thinks of the times when Caduceus has said things to him that were also… not untrue. Things that cut him open and exposed places he had wished to keep unseen. He had resented those moments, even when they were not disagreements. Perhaps more so, when they were not disagreements.

_I'm very proud of you – I was expecting that to be Plan C. Plan G is… is… that's growth._

"Still, it does not matter. It can hurt for someone to… look at you," Caleb says gently.

"No," Caduceus says. "But it's necessary." He looks up again, into the distance but with his expression returned to its usual calm – or what Caleb has always thought of as calm. "He – Ikithon – said that he wanted to make you into someone who would do what was necessary. He meant something very different, of course, and he didn't succeed. But I think you found that strength for the necessary, in your own way. I'm glad of it."

Caleb reaches out to put a hand on his shoulder, but Caduceus is already turning away. 

"I'm going to make some tea," he says, and then, "I still hope you'll tell us about them, when you're ready."

"I will," Caleb says. He leaves it at that.

**Author's Note:**

> Somehow even with a delightful crack ship I have to make Caduceus suffer.


End file.
